I say I say I say..... Crap joke thread #3
- Topic starter BudgiesBeak
- Start date
mezzer
Member
- Location
- Main Stand, Block F, Row 20 seat 174
- Country
England
I saw a woman on the bus today with her breast out feeding her kid.
My Missus said it was only natural.
Not when she was feeding it crisps.
My Missus said it was only natural.
Not when she was feeding it crisps.
ex hibitionist
Member
- Location
- Hastings
- Country
-
England
Woman at the doctor's: "I don't know why but I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green grass of Home'.
Doctor: "It sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."
Woman: "Is it common?"
Doctor: "It's not unusual".
Doctor: "It sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."
Woman: "Is it common?"
Doctor: "It's not unusual".
The new Archbishop of Canterbury was interested in the state of Britain today and the thoughts of the young, so an opinion poll was commissioned and the canvasser stood outside a night club waiting to canvas the young men on their way home, the canvaser asked the first youngster how he viewed lesbian relationships the slightly slurry youth said "well usually in full HD".
Teddy Eagle
Member
- Country
Scotland
Last night I dreamed I'd written Lord of the Rings.
I hadn't.
I was just Tolkien in my sleep.
I hadn't.
I was just Tolkien in my sleep.
BudgiesBeak
Member
- Location
- London
- Country
-
England
A dung beetle walked into a bar. He looked around and said “Excuse me, but is this stool taken?”
Sorry people - it is late
Overheard at social gathering.
Times are so hard that I am considering cancelling my yearly subscription to HMRC.
Dogburger
Member
- Location
- Somewhere at a Cup Winners party
- Country
-
England
I know a crap joke but its got a sh1t punchline
Teddy Eagle
Member
- Country
-
Scotland
My grief counsellor died. He was so good I don't care.
BudgiesBeak
Member
- Location
- London
- Country
-
England
I had my leg X-rayed today.
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm'.
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He said: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54cm'.
I said: 'Inch-high knees?'
He said: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.'
chris123
Member
- Location
- hove actually
- Country
-
England
Not Bob Mortimer's?
The old cryptic crossword clue a girl on each knee which is Pat Ella
Dogburger
Member
- Location
- Somewhere at a Cup Winners party
- Country
-
England
Rumour had it that it was Gus Poyet's .
BromleyMonkey
Member
- Country
-
England
A mate of mine has 2 tickets for the England v Argentina game!!!!
He paid £550 each, including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Derby Registry Office, at 4pm. The bride's name is Sarah --she's 5'7" and quite attractive
He paid £550 each, including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
It's at Derby Registry Office, at 4pm. The bride's name is Sarah --she's 5'7" and quite attractive
Part Time James
Member
- Country
-
England
Blonde or brunette? Hark at me making out I care, I'm in.
BromleyMonkey
Member
- Country
-
England
I have heard you’re not that fussy and you’d fcuk a sore eyed cat
