I say I say I say..... Crap joke thread #3

[Lawrie]

They do not show The Flintstones in Dubai, Bahrain or the United Arab Emirates, but Abu Dhabi do.

Dubai and Abu Dhabi are both in the United Arab Emirates.

 

[Teddy Eagle]

A penguin goes into a bar and asks the publican
Has my brother been in?
Dunno. What's he look like?

 

[ex hibitionist]

Dubai and Abu Dhabi are both in the United Arab Emirates.

oh f*ck off, I'll take a yellow card for that, OK cancel the UAE and replace it with something else, Riyadh then, or Aqaba famously retaken by Lawrence of Arabia and portrayed famously by Peter O'Toole, "I would like a glass of lemonade, we've taken Aqaba." Or somewhere in Kuwait or Qatar or in the Persian Gulf, got any suggestions you killjoy smart *rse?

 

[Badger11]

oh f*ck off, I'll take a yellow card for that, OK cancel the UAE and replace it with something else, Riyadh then, or Aqaba famously retaken by Lawrence of Arabia and portrayed famously by Peter O'Toole, "I would like a glass of lemonade, we've taken Aqaba." Or somewhere in Kuwait or Qatar or in the Persian Gulf, got any suggestions you killjoy smart *rse?

Been there it's a nice little seaside town these days. Oh and I have photos of me with the train they blew up in the film.

Just saying.

 

[doi209]

oh f*ck off, I'll take a yellow card for that, OK cancel the UAE and replace it with something else, Riyadh then, or Aqaba famously retaken by Lawrence of Arabia and portrayed famously by Peter O'Toole, "I would like a glass of lemonade, we've taken Aqaba." Or somewhere in Kuwait or Qatar or in the Persian Gulf, got any suggestions you killjoy smart *rse?

Sir, you have just won response of the year.

 

[Teddy Eagle]

oh f*ck off, I'll take a yellow card for that, OK cancel the UAE and replace it with something else, Riyadh then, or Aqaba famously retaken by Lawrence of Arabia and portrayed famously by Peter O'Toole, "I would like a glass of lemonade, we've taken Aqaba." Or somewhere in Kuwait or Qatar or in the Persian Gulf, got any suggestions you killjoy smart *rse?

When a thread is called Crap Jokes you wouldn't expect hecklers.
A few years ago Kirk Douglas's son (think he was called Eric) was trying to be a stand up. He was on in London and got badly heckled. His response was, "I don't need this sh*t. I'm Kirk Douglas's son" whereupon several people stood up and cried out "No. I am Kirk Douglas's son".

 

[Lawrie]

oh f*ck off, I'll take a yellow card for that, OK cancel the UAE and replace it with something else, Riyadh then, or Aqaba famously retaken by Lawrence of Arabia and portrayed famously by Peter O'Toole, "I would like a glass of lemonade, we've taken Aqaba." Or somewhere in Kuwait or Qatar or in the Persian Gulf, got any suggestions you killjoy smart *rse?

🤣

 

[ex hibitionist]

🤣

They do not show The Flintstones in Dubai, Bahrain or anywhere in the United Arab Emirates, but Abu Dhabi do.

There we are, sorted, happy now?

 

[Zimeagle]

Only just discovered this thread's back.

 

[BromleyMonkey]

.

 

[Teddy Eagle]

Why don't Ukrainians wear Y- fronts?
'Cos Chernobyl fall out.

 

[Forest Hillbilly]

Life expectancy of married men, is much lower than their partners.
So why do married men die earlier than their wives ?

Because they want to.

 

[Teddy Eagle]

Bloke meets a friend he hasn't seen for a while
- What you been up to?
- I'm still playing the guitar, my son is the bassist in a band and my wife and daughter have been doing well at their violin lessons. You should come round and we'll give you a musical evening. How about you?
-I'm still coaching boxing, my son is a pro wrestler and my wife and daughter are getting their 2nd Dan at the karate. Come round one night and we'll give you a bloody good hiding.